Alleged Letterman Extorter Says No Blackmail, Just Business

The trial of accused Letterman blackmailer Robert "Joe" Halderman kicked off this morning with Halderman's lawyer attempting to have the case thrown out by claiming the whole thing was a wacky misunderstanding.

According to the lawyer''s wobbly defense theory, Halderman's attempt to shake down Letterman for $2 million in exchange for a "screenplay" detailing Letterman's sexual dalliances with Late Show staffers wasn't extortion, but a "commercial transaction."

Sure. I can just imagine how that conversation went down: "Excuse me, Mr. Letterman? Yeah, I'm Joe. Big fan, by the way. Anyhow, I have this idea for a movie about this talk show host — well, you, actually — who's been having sex with all sorts of women who work for him, and I figured, hey, I'll bet Letterman would want to pay me $2 million so we can get this movie made!"

As laughable as this sounds, that's precisely what Halderson's attorney, Gerald Sharpel, is attempting to sell. "There was no extortion … there was a screenplay for sale," Shargel said. "This was a commercial transaction, nothing more. The district attorney's office jumped all over this without, I suggest, being appropriately objective."

Funny, but Letterman's lawyer doesn't see it that way. Attorney Daniel Horwitz, who's representing the talk show host, said, "The DA offered compelling evidence that Halderman repeatedly demanded $2 million from Letterman in exchange for not revealing personal or private information. Any attempt to dress this up as anything other than classic blackmail is sophistry by Mr. Halderman's lawyer."

Sophistry! That's telling him . . .

. . . and I'll bet you just Googled "sophistry" to find out what it means.