American Idol 9: Sixteen Candles

Thursday night's results program started off with the obligatory group number. This time, we were blasted with "I Gotta Feeling" by the Black Eyed Peas. Have I mentioned before how much I hate the Black Eyed Peas? Seriously!!! Can't stand them!! So making these 20 kids perform a mushy interpretation of a truly crappy song made me want to run screaming from my house directly into traffic. I decided that would be stupid, because after all, it IS my home. If anybody's gonna leave, it's gonna be these people, or at least four of them.

Let's round this group of 20 down to 16, shall we?

Starting with the boys: Tim Urban dodges a bullet, Todrick Hall is left standing for a bit, Michael Lynche takes a seat, Casey James retains his cougar-bait status, John Park has no choice but to remain standing with Todrick. America voted, and they decided that Shania Twain doesn't know what she's talking about. So, they sent John packing. Time to pick up the remote and fast-forward through Johnny's swan song. See ya!

Boys again: Lee Dewyze is sticking around (YES!), Aaron Kelly gets to sit down, Alex Lambert breathes a sigh of relief, Jermaine Sellers and Andrew Garcia get to stand at centre stage. America voted, and they decided that Jermaine gets to rocks his onesie at home where his dad heats the house to zero below. I guess God wasn't looking out for him after all. Go figure.

Before handing two girls their walking papers, we were offered a bizarre performance from one of last season's biggest sympathy stories, Danny Gokey. It was strange because it was verging on country. Did I not receive the memo? When did Karaoke-Gokey decide he wanted to be a country singer? Not only that, a country singer with a blinged-up leather jacket? Confused? Seems he is, I know I am! Apparently we have Randy Travis to blame for this. Oh, and the writer of the song he sang also lost his wife. Wow. Kismet.

It's the girls' turn: Lilly Scott is rightfully staying with us, Paige Miles gets comfortable, Katie Stevens relaxes, Didi Benami and Michelle Delamor get to stand up and freak out for a bit longer. America voted, and they figure Michelle can go sing more Creed songs in whatever town she came from. She claims she's gonna keep going forward, which is exactly what the FFWD button on my remote control did for me during her final performance.

On to the next set of girls: Katelyn Epperly gets to snore through more Coldplay songs, Crystal Bowersox gets to stay and gives us a reason to keep watching, Siobhan Magnus gets to shout loudly for one more day, Haeley Vaughn and Lacey Brown were left standing. America voted, and they're tired of Haeley. Me too.

So this is good. I'm pretty happy with the eliminations. Not one of these four makes me question America's decision for even the slightest moment. You got it right, USA. Keep moving in that direction and ya just might make me happy yet.

CANUCKGIRL delivers the thrills and spills of America’s favourite singing competition direct to your monitor. CanuckGirl is NOT a professional journalist, nor does she play one on television.